Derek Zoolander, 'Zoolander' (2001)
Derek Zoolander, male model extraordinaire, has a tough time with language. And human interaction. And, okay, most things. His minimal vocabulary is a particular sticking point, from pronouncing "eulogy" as "eugoogooly" to spelling "day" as "d-a-i-y-e." Still, why talk when you can professionally pout better than any man alive? (Big up the Magnum and Blue Steel!) And who needs brains when you're "really, really, ridiculously good-looking?" Still, next to his rival, Hansel, Zoolander may seem like a genius. And judging by his runway work, the man isn't just dumb, he's numb; no man with a nervous system should be able to self-wedgie the way Derek does on the catwalk.
Dumb Factor: 7