1/12/07, 5:45 pm EST

Assignment One Finalist: Brett Lindenberg on Grand Forks, North Dakota

Think you can do better? Prove it, by entering our our contest. Win prizes and get your work published. We’ll announce week two’s assignment Monday, 12:00 p.m. EST.

Note: This is not an official Rolling Stone article. What follows is a submission to the “I’m From Rolling Stone” writing competition.

by Brett Lindenberg
Age: 24

I’ve got a secret. There is a place where good ol’ boys still blare AC/DC from the tailgate of their pick-up trucks; girls continue to lose their virginity to Motley Crue, and “Simple Man” by Lynyrd Skynyrd is sung communally by all God-fearing males ages 16 to 45.

Welcome to Grand Forks, N.D., or more accurately the state of the upper-Midwest music scene.

Never before has a collection of bands – AC/DC, Guns & Roses, Lynyrd Skynyrd – left such a long-standing cultural imprint with its audience. And the truth is, the legacy of these bands will continue to be passed down from father to son for generations in Middle America. So absolute is the influence of these bands in our society that pop-music has failed to be a blip on our musical GPS since Kid Rock’s “Devil Without a Cause.”

But hey, that one was a classic.

Now, I know what you’re thinking: “The Midwest’s struggle to embrace the rest of the countries social norms regarding politics, vernacular, education and fashion – applies to the musical realm as well?” It sure does you organic-eating Starbucks-drinking tree-hugging liberal. And there are some perfectly good reasons for it.

Growing up in North Dakota, I feel the responsibility to interpret Midwestern culture for you and translate the significance of these bands in our culture: (1.) Wild-spirited country boys embrace the classic-rock clichés and straight-forward anthems. They are horny and want to get laid - preferably on the tailgate of a truck. (2.) It is impossible for local rock snobs to argue the cultural significance of AC/DC and Lynyrd Skynyrd. (3.) We’re drunk, and these songs reflect our lives.

The soundtrack for Middle America has already been made, and almost certainly will never change. Plus, we don’t get emo.