'Overwatch' Character Power Rankings
Ana and Trace from 'Overwatch' Glixel

As its contemporaries marvel at the Overwatch-sized hole in their sales numbers, Blizzard's team-based wonder is powering its way to cultural phenomenon status. This time last year, even the most ardent fans of the Irvine-based hit factory – and I'm one – couldn't see that coming. This is, after all, a multiplayer-only game that released at full price on PC and consoles, with a brand new setting and a fresh cast of characters that gains not one bit from Blizzard's decades-long legacy of turning orcs and other assorted geekbait into vast pots of gold. We all expected the game to be a success, but 25 million players? A burgeoning, ambitious pro league? An endless amount of cosplay and fan-art generated from 23 characters and 14 maps? A shockingly comprehensive digital porn scene? It’s insane. With that in mind, welcome to Glixel’s first ever Overwatch character power rankings.

There are plenty of tier lists and meta snapshots out there, but as this game continues to take over the world, we’ll be ranking the Overwatch cast characters on more intangible qualities – their skins, cosplay relevance and potential, and the sigh you unleash when someone on your team picks them in quick match (sorry, Genji.) We’ll still factor in competitive viability, but that won’t be our only focus. There’s already been so many twists in the eight months since the game hit retail. Remember when Zenyatta was a middling support who’s only purpose in life was to eat Widowmaker headshots? Now he’s at the top of tier lists with a beautiful face! Remember when Soldier 76 was a tough-talking Soap MacTavish stand-in? Now he’s a huffy father figure!

Enjoy the rankings, and let’s all pray for Bastion.