A no-hitter always takes precedence here at Flagrant 2, so despite the U.S./Germany World Cup game at noon (and the NBA Draft tonight), we're leading off with Tim Lincecum's shutdown performance against the Padres. What can we say? We're purists.
Here's our breakdown of Timmy's big night, plus, some good old-fashioned nationalism to get you fired up for the World Cup. Slather on that red, white and blue face paint, and start plotting ways to leave work for 2 hours this afternoon...because here we go.
'The Freak' Shuts Down San Diego...Again
Tim Lincecum threw his second career no-hitter last night, and once again, he did it against the San Diego Padres.
The diminutive Giants hurler handled San Diego's punchless lineup with ease, striking out 6 and coming within one walk of a perfect game, and San Francisco cruised to a 4-0 win. Lincecum also no-hit the Padres last year, becoming the first pitcher since Adrian "Addie" Joss of the Cleveland Naps to throw multiple no-hitters against the same team. Joss threw no-nos against the Chicago White Sox in 1908 and 1910, and back then they used a rock for a ball and everyone had rickets or something.
Lincecum also became the 27th player in MLB history to have thrown multiple no-nos...and currently, three of them (Homer Bailey, Mark Buehrle and Justin Verlander) are playing. It was also the third no-hitter of the 2014 season, after Josh Beckett and Clayton Kershaw of the Los Angeles Dodgers.
As has been the case in his recent years, the two-time Cy Young winner was less than overpowering on Wednesday night, throwing 113 pitches, and featured a fastball that topped out at 92 mph. Instead, he relied on control (which is something he should try to do more often) and the sheer sucktitude of San Diego's offense to get the job done. Unlike most no-hitters, there really were no close calls, and afterwards, Lincecum admitted "I didn't feel like my stuff was great."
We cant figure out if that makes it better or worse.
Just in case you were kidnapped or something, please allow us to remind you that the U.S. national team takes on Germany at the World Cup today...and, yes, the stakes are exceptionally high.
With a win (or a draw), the Americans will advance out of the "Group of Death" and into the round of 16--something the U.S. hasn't been able to do in consecutive Cups since, well, ever. And, sure, Germany is one of the five best teams on the planet, a powerhouse program that's been a staple at this tournament for more than 50 years. Yes, we're only 3-6 against them all-time. But this U.S. team is different...they've got the Power of "Believe" behind them. Are we gonna win? You're goddamn right we are.
OK, so technically, we could also lose and move on to the next round too, but then it comes down to math, and the last time this country cared about that, we were hammering out the Three-Fifths Compromise. Also, we're on a roll here...so to whip your nationalistic tendencies into a frenzy ahead of the noon kickoff, here are the most patriotic videos we could find on YouTube. Because this is a big match. And, hey what else are you going to be doing at 12 p.m. on a Thursday? Working?!? That's Un-American.
Screw the Kaiser. USA! USA! USA!