Britney Spears was spotted carrying a copy of Radiohead's In Rainbows. Below is the exclusive transcript of the conversation that led up to this historic photograph.
Britney: All this time in court has made me sluggish, y'all. I need to get to the gym, especially if I'm going to gorge myself on those crazy Tim McGraw Fritos.
Anonymous Hanger-On: Would you like to listen to some music while you're at the gym, Brit?
Britney: I love listening to music while I'm on the Stairmaster y'all, but I lost my magic box that played music.
AHO: You mean your iPod?
Britney: Whatever y'all.
AHO: Well, I've got a CD player you can borrow.
Britney: I remember CDs! I used to sell millions of those a week.
AHO: What CDs would you like to bring?
Britney: I don't have any CDs, y'all.
AHO: What happened? You had a big collection!
Britney: I got hungry, y'all!
AHO: You ate plastic compact discs?
Britney: I thought they were Fritos, y'all.
AHO: Well, let's swing by a record store on the way and we can get you some workout music.
(Minutes later, at Amoeba Records)
Britney: Have y'all ever noticed that Hannah Montana and Miley Cyrus look, like, exactly the same y'all?
AHO: I hadn't.
Britney: I remember when I used to be Miley Cyrus. Then I kissed Madonna and blacked out for a few years. Did anything bad happen?
AHO: Not that I can remember.
Britney: Hey! I think I found something!
AHO: Brit, that's Radiohead's In Rainbows. I doubt that you'd like that.
Britney: What are you talking about? I love rainbows! I'll bet my sister's fetus that they've got a song about puppies, too.
AHO: I don't know, Brit. This looks pretty heavy.
Britney: Nonsense, y'all!
(Britney purchases the disc, goes to work out and emerges an hour later)
AHO: How was your workout, Brit?
Britney: Not bad, though I think I'm afraid of cars now.
AHO: Really?
Britney: And I suddenly have less confidence in the president.
AHO: Oh no.
Britney: And I think our reliance on technology will ultimately be our undoing.
AHO: This is going to be problematic.
[Photo: WENN]
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ED | May 17, 2009 11:19 PM
It's sad that a respectable magazine would post such a disgusting fabrication as that transcript. even as a joke it's ridiculous.
It's actually pathetic on your part. It doesn't require a sense of humor, it's just idiotic.
Morgan | May 13, 2008 5:34 PM
Kudos, Kyle Anderson. Kudos. That made me laugh out loud.
No Surprises | May 12, 2008 5:21 PM
Radiohead is one of those band people claim they like, because they think it makes them seem hip or edgy. It's a no-brainer that a no-brainer like Britney would seen buying a Radiohead album.
benjamin | May 11, 2008 10:46 PM
with all my respect, I am very sorry Thom.
Telling... | May 9, 2008 3:29 PM
I think it says something about her that I thought this wasn't a joke for the first few lines. Or maybe it just says something about me...
Polly | May 9, 2008 1:55 PM
OMG! This is fantastic!
reckoner | May 9, 2008 12:27 AM
oh yeah
hehe i'm just like britney