Today we got a huge poster for Indiana Jones And the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull in the mail. I've seen the trailer and read countless articles about it over the past few months, but seeing the lobby-ready poster made it really sink in — this fucker's finally coming out. Indiana Jones 4 and Rocky 6 were two frequent topics of conversation at my sixth grade lunch table. The questions were endless: Could Rocky still box after the life-threatening brain injury he sustained in Russia fighting Ivan Drago? Is Indiana Jones immortal after drinking from the cup of Christ? Why did Rocky Jr. age so much between parts four and five? Now that Rocky 6 has happened and Indiana Jones is a mere two months away (both distant dreams back in 1995) what else am I sick of waiting for? Here's a list:

Bob Dylan's Chronicles Volume 2: Before the release of Chronicles Volume 1 in 2004, the idea of a non-music Bob Dylan creative project didn't instill much hope in me. The horrors of Masked & Anonymous were still fresh in my mind — as was my college attempt to read Tarantula. Neither made even the slightest bit of sense. I could see everyone involved in both projects saying nothing but, "Another masterpiece Bob!" Needless to say, the book was remarkably lucid, brilliant and insightful. In August of 2006 Dylan told Jonathan Lethem this about the in-progress sequel: "I think I can go back to the Blonde on Blonde album — that's probably about as far back as I can go on the next book. Then I'll probably go forward. I thought of an interesting time. I made this record, Under the Red Sky, with Don Was, but at the same time I was also doing the Wilbury's record." Sounds great to me. I'd rather read an in-depth account of Blonde on Blonde than Oh Mercy, but I have a feeling it will be a long-time before a copy of Chronicles 2 hits my desk — if it ever happens at all.

Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure Part 3: I know, I know…This will never happen and in the off chance it does it would be horrible. Five years ago, however, Keanu Reeves expressed interest in the project. "[Alex Winter] and I have spoken about it," he said. "You know, I've always thought we should do it when we're 40. It would be funny to see them, fat and 40, singing in an airport hotel lounge." I couldn't agree more. Throw in a time machine, the grim reaper and Socrates and you'll have another classic. Bill and Ted's Bogus Journey is a rare sequel that stands up to the original. If you don't believe me, watch it again. Nothing makes me laugh like the scene where they play Twister with Death. No matter how shitty a third one might be, it couldn't possibly be worse than anything Keanu has done recently.

Hoverboards: After Back To The Future: Part 2 came out, the big kids in the back of the school bus told me hoverboards were already out in Japan and would soon be in America. I believed them with every fiber of my being, and was crushed to find out the hard truth. This was eighteen years ago. Since then mankind has invented all sorts of amazing shit. Where's my hoverboard? You know that “Manhattan Project for Energy Independence” people are always talking about? It's a great idea, but those scientists should spend the first couple of weeks inventing the hoverboard. Not only would they make a fortune and fund the project for decades to come, but they would help us get off fossil fuels. I, for one, would definitely use my hoverboard to go everywhere I go. It will be everything they promised us the Segway would be.

Get A Life, The Complete Series on DVD: This one should be a no-brainer. The first season of Becker just came into the office. Who the fuck wants that? Get A Life was one of the funniest TV shows of all time and one of the most deeply bizarre things I've ever seen. I vaguely remember watching one where Chris Elliott built a submarine in his bathtub and got trapped inside with his father. It was unlike anything I've ever seen on network television and I haven't seen it in nearly twenty years. A quick google search reveals a thriving online fanbase for the show. Where is the DVD? Why can't Fox get their act together? The same goes for MTV and their endlessly delayed The State DVD.