While we'd personally prefer to see him playing a washed-up cabana boy on General Hospital, Sebastian Bach has found a different way to follow in the footsteps of his longtime idol, Jack Wagner. The former Skid Row frontman is in the running to replace the soap king in the Broadway smash - okay, middling success - Jeckyll and Hyde. Bach, whose affinity for showtunes couldn't be masked by that "AIDS Kills Fags Dead" T-shirt he caught hell for sporting some years back, is said to be the top choice for the musical's lead role. We can only assume that Kevin Dubrow was too busy -- or had no phone service when the call came in from the Great White Way . . .

When CHARLIE WATTS went to see a man about a horse, he didn't expect to come away with his wallet twenty grand lighter with nothing to show for it. But that's exactly what befell the Stones' drummer in 1998 when he hired a business manager for his stud farm who turned out to be a bit too savvy in the creative accounting department. Watts has taken Paul Atkinson to court, claiming that thousands of pounds earmarked for feed, shelter and, since it was a stud farm, some form of horse pornography, went instead to pay for repairs to Atkinson's home and a vacation for the accountant and his family. While Atkinson denies any wrongdoing, his wife has reportedly admitted to the embezzlement . . .

Proving yet again that proper product placement has its payoff, MAGNETIC FIELDS leader STEPHIN MERRITT was given his very own color -- which is right up there with having a star named after you by one of those companies that advertises in the Globe -- by graphic design giant Pantone. Merritt, who was honored alongside architect I.M. Pei and fashion designer Randolph Duke, may have helped his cause by serenading Pantone's 292 shade of blue on the recent 69 Love Songs. Hey, if we come up with a groovy little haiku, maybe those poetry lovers at The Waffle House will let us add an item to their menu.

DAVID SPRAGUE
(April 29, 2000)